blog from egypt? nahhhh

So a month later, I decided to actually blog a little about Egypt. I figure since I'm writing things in e-mails, I might as well copy and paste some of it and post it up here. Here's just a typical, boring ramble I e-mailed julianna about some of the mumkin deeper thoughts I'm thinking and talking about in Egypt. :

So one thing that’s our prof has talked about some and what I’ve discussed a lot with some of the guys here is the “blood on our hands” so to speak being “children of empire”. Basically, I’ve been trying to deal with the fact that I benefit so much from all these injustices (native Americans, blacks, white privilege, us foreign policy, etc). So, I have a responsibility to correct these injustices, to strive for reconciliation, redemption, and justice. Yet, what does that look like? How do I atone for the sins of those before me, of which I benefit? I don’t really know, I just know that I can’t make full amends. I do believe in progress that a little is better than nothing. I think of The Kite Runner as an illustration of this. something is better than nothing.

EDIT: MASSIVE KITE RUNNER SPOILERS DON't READ THIS PARAGRAPH IF YOU WANT TO READ THIS BOOK

The protagonist admits that he doesn’t know if it’s a happy ending, that if Hassan’s son will ever fully recover. Likewise, it is too late to redeem Hassan, he’s gone, he’s dead. But what he can do is something small. There is no doubt that Hassan’s son is better off than he was being abused by the Taliban. There is no doubt there is a chance for happiness and healing, exemplified by the small, subtle smile at the scene at the end with the kite. I guess I’m just optimistic, but at least there’s something to be done, to be achieved, even if it isn’t enough. Something is better than nothing.

SPOILERS OVER

Theme #2: everything I learn makes me realize how stupid I am. I really know nothing. But how will I be able to ever gain knowledge if I’m satisfied with this? I accept my limitations for the most part, I am not brilliant, if I drastically change the world for the better it will only be through the grace of God or sheer luck, I am not really exceedingly exceptional. But I do have some ability, I do have some purpose, I am valuable, I am capable of something, which is better than nothing. Something is worth striving for. I can help a few people, I can make a little impact. I am 19. There is a little potential.

Theme #3: How do I differentiate myself as a Christian from a Muslim or a Jew? I have nothing substantial beyond my own subjective experience which causes me to have faith, faith based on hope and uncertainty (Hebrews 11:1). I will most likely never be able to accept Islam or Judaism as truth, at least absolute truth, based on my socialization, my own cultural conditioning. How can ever expect a Muslim or a Jew (or a Hindu or an atheist, etc) to ever accept Christianity as truth? To convert? It is doubtlessly non-rational, and debatably irrational for someone else who’s received the same religious socialization as me, the only difference being they were born in Iran, and I was born to a Western, Christian family. The only possibility is the miracle of the Holy Spirit. I was handed my religion, they were handed theirs. Only a miracle can change our religion that has become a part of this. I believe in an active God, one who is capable of miracles, and capable of using his unlikely servants to produce these miracles. Conversion and evangelism, as we know it, is exceedingly difficult in most circumstances, including America, though it is I would guess it is less common in countries with less civil liberty, less legal religious freedom. After all, this is a fallen world. I can only have faith and hope, based on uncertainty and irrationality. This doesn’t disturb me as much as you’d think. It used to. Looks like I’m mellow in my old age.

- I wrote all of that the day before our group was visited by Paul-Gordon Chandler, who wrote a book called "Pilgrims of Christ on the Muslim Road". about mahruz malhouli, a sufi-muslim follower of christ. Amazing, check it out - a testimony of how God works beyond sociological, cultural, historical, economic, and political barriers. These miracles of conversion occur, and this is evidence of it - though some worry about the boundaries of faith issue, I'm less concern. But I'm crazy that way....like a compassionate, post-modern fox.

p.s. more practical blog will come letting you know some of the stuff we've been up to and the crazy fun nuances of life, like, say, david's desert diahrea (which one of the greatest experience of my life - i say this sincerely, no sarcasm, i know its hard to believe, but it was cool) or what about those crazy egyptians

much love all